you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
