the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
