now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
you made out with another girl for some wings
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
