I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
