I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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