She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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