I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
