When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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