O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Say something about gay babies.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize