Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
