I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
