Whod you bang
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
