that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize