I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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