Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
My nipple is on Facebook.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
