Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
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I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
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I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?