I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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