what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
