Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
