The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize