either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize