so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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