I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
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