woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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