who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
