At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
