I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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