Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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