I'd wear matching sweaters with you
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
send nudes
from the living room?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize