So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
