I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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