I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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