life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize