I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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