so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
