do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
