Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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