Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I got inside last night via doggy door
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize