No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
i think i just lost a toe
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize