There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Enjoy the penises
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Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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