i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
At least make sure they are 18
Why
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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