But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
