i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize