I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
porn star boner night. come get it.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
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