i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
You have to summon your inner elephant
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize