try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
