Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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