I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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