Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
