Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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