Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
