Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
